Once upon a time Jules and I wrote a column called "A Single Girl's List." Since then I have had a few requests for updates, or at least further developments. So today, I bring you, "A Single Girl's List as of 9:29 pm on Oct 18."
Guy #1 (blogged about below in "a blog of luv") was his usual almost charming self. We flirt, we laugh, we annoy the hell out of each other. In other words, no progress was made in any direction. But he went out of his way yet again to get my attention, and then does nothing with it.
Guy #2 is asking for a place on my list. He hasn't really earned a place yet, but he's trying. And guys do get points for trying. But so far, I just don't know him very well, so no place yet. (except that i gave him a number) But he lost big points today. I was in a stinky mood most of yesterday, which he knew, and so today he sent me an email with just a happy face and the words, "Hope this makes you happy today." Now, if I actually liked this guy, or we were dating, that would have been kind of cute, but only because it would send the message that he was at least thinking of me. But when it comes from someone you hardly know, its just sort of lame. I'm really not the "send me cutesy smiles and friendship quotes" kind of girl. So when a guy I hardly know sends me an emoticon, he just loses points. And lose them he did. But he is a nice guy. He just needs to make some different moves if he wants to get somewhere.
Guy #3- Continues to be the nicest guy in town. Impresses me every time we talk. I'm enjoying getting to know him better, but am mostly expecting that this will pitter off into "just friends" where all the greatest guys end up. I'm not sure what his deal is. He's a great guy, with plenty of girls after him. But he just doesn't seem to show much interest in any girl. I have seen some great girls completely throw themselves at him, and he just hasn't seemed to care. He's become very good friends with all of them, so much in fact that those same girls have moved on to other guys, but have remained very close friends with him. So my plan of attack is the exactly not that. I don't plan to attack. Play it by the rules, make him come to me. Enjoy talking to him when I see him, respond warmly and simply to emails. But without playing hard to get. He knows me well enough to know that I'm not. (which only irritates me that he knows i'm not hard to get, and yes he hasn't tried to get me)
I just don't get guys sometimes. A guy wants to be seen as manly, tough, a big deal, and yet sends smiley face emails. A guy talks about wanting to get married, starting a family, but yet never goes on dates. A guy compliments you, watches your every move, protects you almost to a fault, and yet every time he gets himself close enough to touch, he forces himself to run away instead.
Fifteen years of dating, and approximately 20 years of being painfully aware of boys, and I am nowhere near closer to figuring out this game.
I have nothing to add but: hear, hear! Except that in moving from Boston to Seattle, I went from having one or two on the list that was constantly frustrating like that, to none on the list, because the pool is much smaller. Or maybe that comes of turning 31....
ReplyDeleteIsn't it the truth. And I loved the title of your blog...sucks you right in. What is it with those guys that are all talk about family and never doing anything about it? I think they THINK they want it...but they don't really want it...at least not enough to work through any issues that may be holding them back.
ReplyDelete