Why My Cat Is Better than Your Cat

I told myself I wasn't going to blog or talk about my cat (much). But today I realized exactly how superior my kitten is to all other cats. He plays fetch and he watches tv. Does your cat do that? I didn't think so.
I bought him some little pink fur mice chew toys a few weeks ago. He only started to notice them this week. He carries one of them around like a baby everywhere he goes. The other one we play fetch with. This morning he woke me up, standing on my chest, with his pink mouse in his mouth. As soon as my eyes opened he dropped the mouse on my face and dashed off. We played fetch from my bed for over an hour. When I would fall asleep between tosses, he would jump on my face and give me little love bites to wake me up. (I pretend they are love bites anyway.)

I also bought him a little cheap play house thing which he loves. I'm normally not the kind of person to buy toys or accessories for my cat. But considering his fascination with playing with me and me only, I had to get him something- anything- to distract him away from biting, playing, chewing, etc with me for just a few minutes a day. The play house has worked wonders in that department. I normally keep it in my bedroom to keep him entertained at night. Otherwise he chooses to attack me most of the night. And if (like a normal person) I lock him out of my room at night, he cries at the door and body slams it FOR HOURS. Not just a few minutes. HOURS. So yes, his play house is right by my bed, and he plays on it for hours until he decides to come and sleep on my head. Because his favorite place to sleep is with his face right up against my face. Nothing else will do apparently.
So back to why my kitten with separation anxiety is superior to other cats. Not only does he play fetch, sing, attempt to type, and cry every time I leave the room he is in, today he dragged his play house from its normal resting place to the door. He couldn't navigate how to get it around the turn and out the door, but still, he dragged it to the door! I'm guessing he wanted to bring it into the living room where I am working today.
It's the strangest thing I have ever seen. This cat will not leave me alone!
In other happy news, his baby teeth are finally starting to break. If you have seen the scratches and bites on my arms lately you'll understand why I am so happy about this.
And don't tell the kitten, but tonight he gets his first bath and a real claws clipping. I can't take it anymore!