dear diary

Dear Diary, 

Life continues to move at a crazy fast pace. In the last few days I have registered for college classes (prerequisites for my masters degree), picked up 2.5 freelance part-time jobs, which includes promoting another movie (which is a ton of fun to do, and a ton of work), gone on real job interviews,  applied for more jobs, worked as an extra on 2 different projects (1 movie, 1 commercial), written (and got it published) a letter to the editor, prepared for the trip to Greece, and recorded my audition pieces for a choir. 

Oh the things I am capable of when not saddled with a 9-5 job. Speaking of jobs, as crazy as it sounds, if I can keep working as an extra 5 or so times a month, plus do these 2 freelance part-time jobs, and then also work a 10 hr/wk part-time job in social work, I may be able to actually support myself, and not get a "real" job. It's not as bad as it sounds. And it would give me a lot of flexibility as I start taking classes again. 

Who would have ever imagined I'd finally bite the bullet and go back for my masters at age 42? I won't finish until I'm 45, which seems absolutely crazy. But I'm glad I'm doing it. It's relieving and exciting to finally pursue a dream I've always had. I will no longer just be a volunteer doing humanitarian work. But I will be able to eventually do humanitarian work full-time for a cause I greatly care about (fighting sex trafficking). 

I think this year I will also break my personal record for number of countries visited and trips abroad. Technically a few years ago I went to Russia, Romania, Serbia, and Mexico all in a 1 yr period. That was my previous record to beat. If all goes according to plan, I will have visited England, Germany, Holland, Greece, and Canada within this year. (Still working out a possible layover where I might get to add a 6th country to that list.)

The world just keeps spinning faster and faster on me. I've never been more grateful for my diverse set of skills that allows me to do so many things. I just never would have guessed that I'd be drawing on my marketing, creative/music, and medical skills all at the same time. 

Be gentle with me, Universe. Sooner or later I'm going to spin off my axis. 

Making a Difference With the Life You Are Given

Sometimes it can feel like life can move at an overwhelming pace. But it only feels like that when I'm not in control of the events around me that are changing. And that pretty much describes the last 6 weeks of my life.
In a nutshell, I am mostly unemployed, but very actively pursuing 2 unrelated fields, preparing to move (again, but permanently this time), applying to graduate schools, and gearing up for a major humanitarian trip.
It's the humanitarian trip I want to talk about today.

As soon as my job became a thing of the past, I became depressed. It's common and normal to get depressed after losing your livelihood, and having no control over the situation. (It's depressing even when you do have control over the situation.)
But I didn't want to stay depressed. I have a good life. Not having a steady paycheck isn't actually the worst thing ever. I have a good support system. And I have ideas about what I want in the future.
And I also very firmly believe that God is in control of the details. The situation around losing my job was so unexpected and strange that I have to believe it was divinely guided.

Losing my job was God's Will?

Yes. Trust me, it isn't always easy to believe or think that. But I believe that it was. He led me right to this place in life. His Hand was in everything that brought me to Utah and to that job. I have to trust that His hand is in everything that has happened since.
It doesn't mean that everything has been perfect and easy since that day. It's been anything but.
I did have the wonderful and surprising blessing of a great side gig landing in my lap exactly 2 hours after the job ended. I took it. It has been a great situation for me. I've been working as an extra on TV shows and movies. How's that for unexpected and random? Very few people in my life these days were around 20+ years ago when I did that sort of thing before. It was more of a hobby or source of amusement back then. And now somehow it's paying me decent money.
I've been blessed. I've been very fortunate that I haven't hit rock bottom.

The day after I lost my job I started thinking about what it is I really want to do with my life. (I loved my job, and it paid well, and was a good professional experience. But it wasn't fulfilling.) If I had the freedom to do and be anything I want, what would it be?
And the answer came to me very quickly- humanitarian work. Get your hands dirty, make a difference, work to exhaustion, save the world, humanitarian work.
If you know me, you know I've always been deeply involved in different aspects of humanitarian work. But I haven't done something tough or in-depth in several years. I do plenty of volunteer work, but nothing like the work I miss doing. The kind of work I did back in Haiti and Cambodia.
And that's when it hit me. I know where I am needed, I know who I want to serve, and I know how to make it happen.

My dear friend Katie runs a group called Humanitize Expeditions that takes medical teams to various places to do good. Usually it's either Guatemala or Haiti, but this year, for the first time, she's taking people to Greece to serve in a refugee camp.
And she's invited me to go with them.
Specifically I'm going with the team to do some unusual things. First, I do have a medical service background. Many moons ago I was an EMT. I can still take a BP, pulse, and do a quick triage assessment. (Those are skills you don't forget or lose. In fact, when I go to the doctor now, I almost always try and take my BP myself, or at least guess what it is if they won't let me touch the sphygnometer.) So I will be able to support and assist the real medical staff. But I'll also get to put my writing skills to work. I will be interviewing the refugees, taking video, and pictures of them, and sharing them with the world. I want to share the plight of the refugee in an unbiased and true way.
It is so important that we all understand what the refugees are really going through. We don't learn the unbiased truth from the media. They are telling a different story about the situation. They aren't telling the stories of the individuals. And I want to share the personal stories.

Preserving the truth and their stories is so important for all of us to learn from. In the future do we want the next generations to know what CNN or Fox said about the aid or bombs regarding the refugees? Or do we want them to know what led the people to leave their homes and risk their lives just to end up in a tent city thousands of miles away? I believe it's the personal stories that matter. Those are the ones we can learn from.
One special thing I will be doing on this trip is taking a camera that prints instant photos to share with the refugees. If there is one thing I have learned from humanitarian work, and traveling around the world, it is that small children love to take pictures with you. But usually that pictures ends up on your phone, and the child gets nothing. So I'm bringing my instant camera and film so that the children can take a picture home with them.
Earlier in July I was in Germany with Clog America. The group performed for refugee families that have resettled in Germany. I took my camera with me and went through 60 pictures in less than 20 minutes.

When I would first take the picture and hand it over the children didn't understand what was happening. (It was just a white picture.) But once it developed, the kids loved it and would run to show their parents. And nearly every single parent would come up to me with their whole family and ask, "family photographia?" These families that have lost everything as they traversed the world, don't have old family photos with them. The tiny little Polaroid picture I could hand them made them so happy.
The pictures interspersed here are the refugee children from that experience. They were so darling. And they became our instant friends for life. Any time they would see us in town after that they were so happy. I got many spontaneous hugs from small children for several days, all because I took their picture.

Doesn't this little girl's story deserve to be heard and preserved?

I can't do this trip alone. If there is one downside to unemployment it's the limited funds. If I am to make this trip a reality, I must raise more money in order to go. The funds will go to travel expenses for the medical and support teams, and more importantly to medical supplies.
I'm already taking a full suitcase of clothing and towel donations. (My clothes for the trip will have to fit in my backpack.) I have easily 5 more suitcases worth of clothing and supplies I could take with me. But I have to raise the money to pay for the baggage fees. I'm working with the airline to work something out, and I'm working with Best Buy to see if I can get more film donated. But even after their help, I still need to raise more money to make it all happen.

The money raised really and truly goes right to a refugee family. And in return you get to see the pictures of the families they go to. You'll get to see video and hear their stories first hand. What other charitable donation can do that for you? Your donation no matter how big or small will make a difference, and you will get to see the person it benefited.

You can donate through my GoFundMe account here. Or if you prefer, you can send it via PayPal.me to me directly. Donations large or small are welcome. If you want to make a specific donation, the film for the camera is $16 a packet. And I want to take 20 packets or more if possible.
At the risk of sounding like a Sally Struthers commercial, for just $16 you can make a huge difference in the life of a refugee.

(forgive the shakiness of the video- I was also holding a kid on my hip as I filmed it)

A spark of freedom

Got into a very heated... "conversation" (I won't call it a full blown argument, because I never cared that we were in the conversation, but the other party may have felt it was a full throw down) with someone tonight. I had never met this person before. And for the record, he started it.
He made it very, very clear that he has strong political feelings about all refugees being evil. And how we shouldn't allow them into our country when (and I quote) "my buddy has to wait 4 months to get glasses at the VA hospital."
He was quite adamant that "all those liberals who say let them in, let them in" are fine with the government paying for it, but would "never let them into their homes."
(I silently laughed on the inside that I was being called a liberal. That was a first, for sure.)
I told him that I would be more than happy to allow refugees into my home. I told him how much I have donated and given to refugee aid programs.
His response was colorful. He provided a few interesting ways that he is superior to others because of the good deeds he has done. And then basically challenged me to prove that I both "walk the walk and talk the talk."
It comes down to this- in the heat of the "conversation" I've never been more grateful for the opportunities that have come my way to serve others. I am grateful that I can proudly stand up and say that I don't just vent and complain or protest. But that I have gone out there and served and worked to solve problems.
The other person wasn't happy. He certainly didn't expect my response. He didn't back down. But it sure felt good to know that I have nothing to be ashamed of. I've done my part. And always will.

Alma 60:27-28

 27 And I will come unto you, and if there be any among you that has a desire for freedom, yea, if there be even a spark of freedom remaining, behold I will stir up insurrections among you, even until those who have desires to usurp power and authority shall become extinct.

 28 Yea, behold I do not fear your power nor your authority, but it is my God whom I fear; and it is according to his commandments that I do take my sword to defend the cause of my country, and it is because of your iniquity that we have suffered so much loss.

Orphanage Day

Today was orphanage day. We had a wonderful time visiting an orphanage in Belgrade and then a home for mentally disabled men. It was so much fun. I taught the little girl in this picture how to blow bubbles, and the joy of playing with a slinky. I may have even taught her to say slinky.
I won't be in many pictures during this trip, since I'm the one taking pictures of everyone else. There are lots of stories and pictures up on the Clog America blog and Instagram feed today.
All in all, a great day.
Stories and pictures to come when I have 5 minutes to myself. 

You Can Make a Difference to a Serbian Orphan

You know me, and you my two passions in this world are humanitarian work, and orphanages. I've visited orphanages in Romania, Haiti, and Cambodia. I plan to work at an orphanage in China next year. And in just four weeks from now I will be visiting an orphanage in Serbia with Clog America. 

And we need your help!

As you may recall, I am going with Clog America on their international dance tour to Romania and Serbia in July. While they travel, Clog America makes it a point to visit different charitable organizations, and make a difference where they can. 

This year they (we) will be visiting Zdrinka Pavlovic, an orphanage in Serbia for 35-40 disabled or abandoned children. We are collecting various items to help the orphanage better serve their children. 

During the month of May, flooding caused widespread devastation in Belgrade, Serbia. Our help in this area is needed now more than ever! Your donations can help bring aid to those left homeless by these floods, and can help us bring aid to the orphanage that originally inspired this humanitarian project. Keep reading for more details. Every dollar helps!

Our goal is to raise enough money to provide the children with as many of the following items as possible:
Hygiene kits
Pajamas
Clothes for young adults
Underwear for ages 6-18
Crayons
Jump Ropes
Small Blankets (I know some of you are quilters out there! How about a small twin sized quilt or bedspread for an orphanage?) 
Soccer Balls
Sock Puppets
Bedding size 90 x 190cm
Mattress
Bed
Dishwasher
Deep Fryer


A percentage of the money raised will go towards the items listed above, and towards the relief efforts to help those affected by the floods in Belgrade. We are accepting physical donations of the above items (you can give it to me, and I can take it with me, or if you live in another state, we can arrange for shipping or a drop off with someone else), as well as monetary donations.

You can contribute towards these efforts on the GoFundMe page - http://www.gofundme.com/7aih94 . 
So far only $220 of the desired $2,500 has been raised. 


Check out this cute video of Clog America visiting a children's hospital in Poland two years ago.

Support Riverkids and Fight Sex-Trafficking in Cambodia with just $10!

 Your donations will go to help these exact girls in this picture! Plus many more!

Can you donate $10?

Global Giving's going to split their huge Girl Effect fund — $450,000 raised last year — between 12 winning charities this November. And with a $10 donation, you can help Riverkids win.

We need to get at least 800 unique donors in November to win and completely fund our wonderful Get Ready for Girls in Cambodia. How are we going to do that? With your help!!

Can you donate $10 and then ask 10 friends to donate $10? 


Tell them why you support Riverkids. (Read about my personal experiences with Riverkids!)

Tell them about living in slums in Cambodia where a girl has to choose between collecting trash on the streets or being sold to a bar, and school is a distant dream. (Break out your tissue box and read my first-hand account of meeting these girls and what their lives are really like.)


Tell them how their $10 will snowball into support for those girls to get a chance to go back to school or find safe jobs.

Tell them that you know their $10 will go to local grassroots work that gives practical help that works.

Tell them that more than sixty girls  have already graduated, and one of them, Sothea, is headed to university this year on a scholarship, the first in her family ever to even graduate high school!!!

The Story of RiverKids in Cambodia

Riverkids started with one little girl’s bravery.

In late 2001, the adopted daughter of a Singapore family told her new parents how she had been trafficked. She had been warned never to speak of it, abused and deceived again and again, and she took a leap of faith and trusted again.

The adoptive family found the rest of the children, adopting two more, and began building ties with the Cambodian community their children are from. We started with the children of a neighbour who had helped our children. Slowly we added some more children until in early 2005 we had twelve children at kindergarten and school. The children had overcome huge obstacles and were flourishing. Other families wanted their children to join, but we didn’t have the resources for more.

So in August 2005, we took a deep breath and decided to look for more supporters. Friends and families joined in, and we were able to rent a room and then a house, hire teachers and social workers and grow.

In 2007, we registered as a local non-governmental organization in Cambodia, Riverkids Foundation. We set up a private charitable trust in Singapore, Riverkids Project, to oversee the finances and operations.

We now have three sites, Alexandra, Blum and Railway 2, with more than 400 children in Phnom Penh. We have had babies born, teenagers graduate and go on to safe jobs, and seen families transformed.